Six Things

There's a pink Himalayan salt lamp that sits on my bedside table casting a pink glow around my room at all hours of the day. I work late into the night coping verbal abuse from 40-something year old mums who are angry that their hair has gone flat. I get home after midnight some weekdays, mindlessly shower and then throw myself into bed ready for five hours sleep before I have to be up for classes in the morning. The pink glow of the salt lamp is the only light that greets me when I get home on these late nights

There's an old man who lives next door to me, every-time I go to the bathroom I can hear him at his computer just clicking...clicking....clicking away. If you leave my bathroom window open, you can see him at his computer through the mirror. One night he was watching porn. The bathroom was off limits for me that night. 

There's a big red scar covering my right elbow. I was out one night, not even close to being drunk, despite the doctors all thinking I was. I tripped at a crossing and landed on my right elbow, breaking it. I went to hospital that night with one of my friends who was drunk. We made friends with a boy my age who had broken his knee running away from the police. He now comes to my work sometimes, to buy food, and we silently acknowledge each-other. Hospital buddies. And what about my elbow? Well I now can't straighten out my right arm properly. Or lean on my right elbow. But hey, I have a pretty hectic scar right? 

There's a disposable camera sitting in the back of my wardrobe. The film on it contains pictures of a party I went to ages ago. The film captures the good moments of the party; people I haven't seen in ages, my leopard print faux fur coat which was too hot to wear but I wore it anyway, funky hats, people looking a bit worse for wear, spilt glitter. But what about the bad moments? The film doesn't capture people putting holes in the walls, a drunken fight between two dominant males over nothing really, me sobbing drunkenly on the floor. So do I really want to get the film developed? Honestly, I probably do. But for now the disposable camera stays sitting in a box in the back of my wardrobe, collecting dust. 

There's a soft fluffy white blanket that's been sitting underneath my bed for the past couple of months, waiting for summer to be over. I used to have it on my bed during winter. I remember my mum bought it for me last year when I was cold and still had my arm in a cast. It was huge, and the softest thing I'd ever felt. As it got colder and colder during winter last year I took the blanket with me everywhere. At my house, we would have friends over and we'd stay up until the early hours of the morning until the sun was threatening to break the entrancement of the night. I shared my blanket with my friends, until eventually I began to just share it with one friend in particular. It wasn't even on purpose, I just found myself always sharing it with him. One night after a party, when I was feeling particularly shit, I was sharing this blanket on a small couch downstairs with this friend again. He had pretty blue eyes and he was shy. His eyes always spoke more than he ever did though. His eyes closed as I kissed him for the first time, wrapped up in my soft fluffy blanket. 

There's a manager at my work who I get along quite well with. She's not much older than me. Each shift we have together we always discuss Riverdale. I've recently convinced her to start watching Shameless. Every-time I see however, she always complains about how she feels stuck in her job and how she doubts herself. Sometimes I just want to grab her and shake her, I don't think she realises how amazing she is. It makes me wonder why we all doubt ourselves. We really are all so powerful.

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